My Secrets

I feel fat just because when I bend over my stomach scrunches up.

I can't sleep when I am stressed or confused.

My first suicide attempt was in 7th grade.

I attempted it 11 times after that.

I used to cut myself, I even became so desperate I used a key one day.

I tell every one that the scars on my ankles are from soccer.

My happiness is dependent on the amount of love I feel from other people.

Right now, I am experiencing little to none of that.

I believe everything every one tells me about myself that is negative and store it in my heart.

Ugly, stupid, waste of space, not worth my time.

I believe in God but I don't think that the LDS church is right for me.

I hate texting.

I cover everything up with, "I'm fine."

I feel worthless.

My life, is worthless.

I've wanted to be a vet since I was 5 or 6, but I gave up that dream because of my patriarchal blessing.

I have PTSD.

I hate crying infront of people so I smile instead. I just laugh it off.

When I was in seminary one day, and I was losing everything around me, I went into the bathroom and kicked the stalls for a half an hour.

I can't cope without a song that descibes exactly how I feel.

I wanna cry- Keith Urban.

I haven't ever had the desire to become great.

I just want to blend in.

I would rather be single than have my heart broken anymore.

I sucked my thumb until I was 11 years old.

I pick my fingernail polish off when I'm depressed.

I play video games, and yes I do enjoy them.

I'm almost positive that if I was tested they would tell me that I have ADD and dyslexia.

I've never been bullied at school, but home is a different story.

I've been kicked out of my house.

I've lied to the cops and have been caught doing it.

I can't ever put what I'm feeling into words.

I think I can't because I've never done it before.

I used to sleep under my bed when my parents were fighting.

I've never gone home in search of a sanctuary.

I don't believe in love anymore.

I knew that my last relationship was going to end from the begging but it still hurt.

I love my name.

I'm never satisfied with anything I do.

I'm not a virgin.

I don't want to get married or be in a relationship with some one but I want kids.

Adoption it is.

90% of the time, you could find me crying myself to sleep.

This is the life no one knows.