Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Same love

I'm scared.
I'm scared that my dreams will become better than my reality.
I'm scared that the sun will not rise one day and I'll live with the creepy things that lurk in the dark.
I'm scared that I won't fall in love.
I'm scared that I have fallen in love but it just wasn't as great as people have made it seem.
I'm scared that my future is already planned for me.
I'm scared that I might have complete control over it.
I'm scared of how I feel and who I am.
I'm scared of people finding out too much about me because I feel like being an open book is the equivalent to being uninteresting.
I would much rather be mysterious.
I'm afraid that I ask too much.
I'm scares that I just let people walk all over me.
I'm scared I'm too nice and rude.
I'm afraid that I'm not afraid of reasonable and common things.
Like spiders. Or heights.
I'm afraid that I am too independent.
I'm scared that I am too comfortable with the idea of being alone.
I'm scared that you are scared of me.
I'm scared that I might not be able to help.
I'm scared to live.
I'm scared to die.
I'm scared that there is a god and I just disappoint him daily like I do with my parents.
I'm scared that I laugh at my own pain.
I'm scared that I don't cry.
I'm scared of what I don't know.
The "unknown".
I'm scared of the dust that collects on things I neglect. I feel like I am neglecting memories that do not exist.
I am afraid that every one lies.
I'm scared to be who I really am.
I need to come out.
Ive been hiding with the skeletons.
Now I am coming to realize who I am.
I've been watching through the slits in the door for too long.
I am going to come out and be myself.
This is who I am.
And if you can't catch on then maybe you shouldn't know.